Fact: I am blogging under the influence.
I am high as a kite--sucking on a lime flavored popsicle, doped up on Percocet after undergoing minor surgery 3 days ago.
Minor Surgery. No surgery seems minor, but this one was minor in the sense that it wasn't an emergency, wasn't done to save my life, and it wasn't because Columbian drug lords pulled a gun on me, demanding my kidney for their underground organ thieving ring.
With that said, that's all I'll say--so if you'll excuse me, I have to return to my sweet drugged slumber--where a little girl plays in a bright yellow dress, where a dollar sign hangs outside a big pink house, and where pain relief is always only 4 to 6 hours away.