The lotus flower

It floats upon the water-it is, among other things, a symbol of rebirth. But regardless of its beauty and fragile appearance, its roots are buried deep into the mud. Despite its constant state of openness, it remains one of the strongest flowers in nature.

Although I can’t even really explain this image, this is exactly how I'm beginning to feel about men.

Just like that

After experiencing disappointment away, and then a loss (separate) when I returned home, I had my first moments alone tonight, and the effects of it all came through in a flood of tears. It felt as if it would never end, this feeling, this me lying on top of my bed, curled into a position that one might be instructed to assume in a trench while bombs were dropping overhead-as if that would save you.

But then without a conscious thought, I got up, went into the shower and washed myself clean. Later, as I stood wrapped in my favorite pink towel, I looked in the mirror and my heart lifted.

No doubt before I'm old and then gone, my heart will be heavy again many times over. But it's that moment in the mirror that I know so well, and that reminds me of how, for no apparent or obvious reason, the spirit can be freed-just like that.

Thought in real time

I didn't miss out on a great big love...I just dodged a great big bullet.

Unsolicited advice from me

Never consider someone a friend (and certainly not a potential lover) who, when you mention to him that you're writing a book, doesn't ask a thing about it.

Don't travel 6,000 miles because someone you hardly know tells you how much he wants to see you.

Try not to share your loveliness with someone who doesn't appreciate your loveliness.

Only have almond milk with your morning coffee if you really like that sort of thing.

This Woman Wonders...

...if there is such a thing as a Super Man.

All in a day

Yesterday I met a man named Dallas, drank a bad Margarita with salt, and watched a little boy skipping through a field of fireflies.

Reflection

Today when Annie and I walked from 42nd Street to 86th along the river path at sunset, it was like magic. Silent and cool, a breeze blew the flowers and willow trees against the backdrop of sunlit water. My daughter was radiant and the love we share, the connectedness we feel cannot be described. Together we laid our eyes on the face of a sweet puppy, a regal dog, a family of geese and a stunning black couple. Our mutual affection traveled through our holding hands-my daughter, an unusual and magnificent creature, an exotic bird who was born to fly, and me, her mama-the lucky one given the chance to love a girl as rare as she.

As I know who Annie is and what she is worth, I know who I am and what I am worth. As I know I will only ever want her to accept the love of a man whose heart is open, a man who is deserving of her, worthy of her, and who sees her as the gift she is, I know I will only accept the same for me. A man with an open heart and a playful mind-and who sees me as clearly as I see myself at sunset-being reflected back through the eyes of my child.

Confession #456,998

London has been great, even the weather has been beautiful. But what I really feel is that Saturday can't come soon enough.