Sunday, November 30, 2008

Conversation continued

Me: "Being in Sedona at the brewery sounds like a lot more fun than being home lying in bed."

Bruce: "That's true, but if I weren't at the brewery, I'd probably just be home playing solitaire."

Me: "If I were in Sedona and you were home playing solitaire..."

Bruce: "... you could come over and I could bounce cards off your stomach!"

Me: "Exactly!"

In real time

While lying in bed listening to Avalon by Roxy Music, I began to drift off to sleep. Then, this part of the song, the lyrics below--they made me smile.


When the samba takes you

Out of nowhere
When the background's fading
Out of focus
Yes the future's changing
Every moment
And your destination
You don´t know it.

Saturday night phone call

Bruce: "Hi Katie!"

Me: "Hi Bruce!"

Bruce: "What's the matter?"

Me: "Nothing's the matter."

Bruce: "Come on, I can hear it in your voice."

Me: "Oh, you think you know me soooo well!"

Bruce: "Have you been drinking?"

Me: "No I have not. Where are you?"

Bruce: "At the brewery."

Saturday, November 29, 2008

Film review

Tonight I watched the 1994 film "An Affair of Love," the story of two Parisians who meet after one places an ad in a magazine, seeking a pornographic affair.

I don't know if the reviews were good or bad, and I don't care if it went to Sundance or Cannes. I deeply related to the two characters, and was captivated from the first frame to the last. And you've got to hand it to the French for making a film that you just don't expect, and one that takes a long time before it's out of your heart and out of your head.

Five stars from me.

Celebrity crush

Sergi López

Post-op preachin'

I took this photo today from my bed--just after lecturing Annie and Giselle on the importance of friendship, integrity, and taking the high road.

Quote

I'm convinced if we don't travel with baggage, we show up underdressed for dinner.

~David Kosh

Heavy Metal...

... soft as a flower.

Click on image to enlarge, then visit Pattern Recognition for more.

Saturday phone call

Me: "Hello?"

Elizabeth: "Katie, it's me--I just wanted to tell you that I'm standing in the Grand Canyon and it's much bigger than your belly button!"

Post-op day 17

I still want to sleep most of the time--that's Louie.

Photo by Annie Kosh.

Friday, November 28, 2008

Sitting at the sidebar

Day 16 post-op--now I'm talking to myself.

Click the music player and listen to me say a whole lotta nuthin'.

Conversations with my ex


Me: "Tell me some of the things you love about Lou Ann."

David: "She's smart, she's funny, she has a strong work ethic, she's creative, she and I share the same values and I'm attracted to her. Those are the big things, then there are other nice things--special, optional features like the fact that she cooks. It's like a moon-roof--not necessary, but it's nice to have."

2:00 am.

Too awake to sleep, too exhausted to take my father's advice.

Thursday, November 27, 2008

Frogs don't eat turkey

Jump here.

The dance

Two weeks ago I took my overnight bag and left the apartment at 6:30 am. I boarded the "A" train, transferred to the "C," then got off on 96th Street and Central Park West. It was a beautiful morning, with a beautiful blue sky to match my good mood.

I took the crosstown bus to Fifth Avenue, then sat on a park bench and watched the squirrels migrate to spots on the grass where the sun was brightest. When it was time, I picked up my bag and headed to the entrance on 94th Street, just east of the park.

A well-choreographed dance--planned but effortless, rehearsed but not forced. The older nurse held my hand and lead me into a room--a gown, now another room, cold inside, onto the table, "Are you comfortable?"

The young nurse whose face I couldn't see behind her mask, stroked my arm before we even met. It was as if all the love her mother and father gave her was transferred to me--laid on the table, just like I was.

"A shot to relax you," said the anesthesiologist, and then I was. Relaxed.

"Do you mind this mask so close to your face?"

"No," I said, "I don't mind."

"You did great," said the nurse.

"I did?" I said. "It's over?"

"It's all done," the surgeon cheerfully chimed in. "And now we just want you to rest."

Wednesday, November 26, 2008

After the bath

Today I took a shower
Tonight I surrender to melancholy
Tomorrow I give thanks.

Mid-week interlude

Me: "I decided I'd be a much happier person if I were Paco de Lucia."

David: "You don't know that, besides, he's bald and ugly."

Katie: "So? I have hair and I'm pretty and a lot of good that's doing me tonight."

David: "Katie, it's only Wednesday."

Sitting at the sidebar

The neighbors are playing Journey again.

"Do I have to listen to this crap?!" I shout.

I get out of bed, struggle to plug in the speakers, and stick in my iPod.

At first I give them a dose of Coltrane, then a shot of Mingus--but then I think I find the Cure.

Maybe the neighbors will like it, maybe there's a common ground--maybe, just maybe they can start their own healing.


To listen, click the music player to the right.

Yesterday & today

Yesterday the rain stopped and the sun came out through a charcoal sky. I had coffee with a friend, visited the girls at the salon, and bought something pretty to wear for tomorrow. I got a bag of candy for Annie and her pals, and delivered it to the playground where they jumped Double Dutch. I walked the dog, made dinner for two, and watched a movie I didn't like.

Today I am barely able to move, and can only manage to sleep and sleep and sleep.

Tuesday, November 25, 2008

Film review

Tonight I watched The Squid and the Whale.

Fine acting, critically acclaimed, Sundance winner, nominated for an Academy Award.

Hated it.

Thanks giving

At today's post-op visit, I brought my surgeon a gift--a copy of "Six Word Memoirs."

Inside it I wrote:

"Dear Dr. Keegan, in 6 words: Thank you for making me prettier."

4:30 am.

Had little sleep, woke bound and burning--sideways now, can't catch my breath.

Sick of sicles, hungry for toast, no complaining, just make it art.

Ha!

Recovery day 12

Bruce called and made me laugh, mom called and made me loved. The neighbor sent over chicken soup and I shaved my legs. Chloé came late and we walked in the rain--and I got an ice cream bar, the kind with 3 flavors.

I like the distant sound of a car alarm and tires on wet ground--but tonight feels lonely.

Monday, November 24, 2008

Pain in perspective

Annie: "Is the doctor going to take out that drain from your wound tomorrow?"

Me: "Yes, and I'm terrified."

Annie: "How come?"

Me: "Because last week he removed the first one, and it hurt so badly I started crying."

Annie: "Mom! You had surgery! You could have died--you could have died on the table and you didn't! Now you're going to worry about having a tube removed?"

Sunday, November 23, 2008

Post-op Girl!

Even though these pathetic pictures have all been taken from bed, I feel it only fair to report that in the past week, while enduring intense discomfort and sometimes excruciating pain, I have done more than eat Popsicles, take Valium and pop Percocets.

I have bathed a dog, shampooed my hair, washed my sheets and paid my bills. I have gone for coffee, seen my doctor, hiked 4 flights of stairs and had conferences with 3 of Annie's teachers. And yesterday? Yesterday I attended closing night of The Show Might Go On.

Now you may say that isn't much, but before I'm fully recovered, I do have bigger plans--they include fighting crime, saving lives, and maybe, just maybe, I'll have Proposition 8 overturned in the state of California.

I'll keep you post-opted.

Alert the media!

Annie Kosh has blogged!

Click here to see what's on her mind and read all about her latest obsession!

Saturday, November 22, 2008

Sitting at the sidebar


I have to admit...

It's getting better all the time

I'm not lifting weights yet, but tonight I'm starting to feel like my old (young) self again.

Poor pitiful me

Wrote this around midnight--fell asleep before I could post it.

Screw this.

I'm sick of this.

I know I'm healthy, blessed lucky and loved--but after nine days of being relatively home-bound, I have turned inward. Seemingly overnight, I have become an evil, angry girl. I've managed to spare family, friends and the dog from my wrath, but I haven't smiled all afternoon, I've pushed the laptop aside and cursed David's remote, the one that never finds anything worth watching.

I know I'm fortunate and surrounded by love, but tonight I am an ungrateful and ornery princess--locked alone in her tower, wishing to be rescued and whisked away--maybe to Greenwich Village, definitely wearing something great, and most certainly by a tall, dark and handsome Romeo.

Doctor says two weeks to go--and when that day comes, believe me, I'm outta here.

Friday, November 21, 2008

Post-op talk

After waking up from surgery, I looked at my doctor.

"Did you cut me?" I asked coyly.

He laughed.

"I did."

"That wasn't very nice of you Doctor," I said. "Didn't your mother ever tell you it's not nice to cut people?"

How deep is your love?

When my first boyfriend Russell saw my unclothed body he said, "Your belly button is the size of the Grand Canyon!"

Thursday, November 20, 2008

Recovery day 8


It's official, I'm bored.

Going to David's to watch TV.

Obama's language stirs controversy

An article forwarded to me this morning by my mother:


By Andy Borowitz.

In the first two weeks since the election, President-elect Barack Obama has broken with a tradition established over the past eight years through his controversial use of complete sentences, political observers say.

Millions of Americans who watched Mr. Obama's appearance on CBS' "60 Minutes" on Sunday, witnessed the president-elect's unorthodox verbal tick, which had Mr. Obama employing grammatically correct sentences virtually every time he opened his mouth.

But Mr. Obama's decision to use complete sentences in his public pronouncements carries with it certain risks, since after the last eight years many Americans may find his odd speaking style jarring.

According to presidential historian Davis Logsdon of the University of Minnesota, some Americans might find it alienating to have a President who speaks English as if it were his first language.

The historian said that if Mr. Obama insists on using complete sentences in his speeches, the public may find itself saying, "Okay, subject, predicate, subject predicate - we get it, now stop showing off!"

The President-elect's stubborn insistence on using complete sentences has already attracted a rebuke from one of his harshest critics, Gov. Sarah Palin of Alaska.

"Talking with complete sentences there and also too talking in a way that ordinary Americans like Joe the Plumber and Tito the Builder can't really do there--I think needing to do that isn't tapping into what Americans are needing also," she said.

1 week post-op

Determined to recover quickly, I took a walk outside today in what felt like winter. I bought broccoli at Jins and coffee at the new place on the corner. I did 2 loads of laundry and gave the puppy a bath--I might even fall asleep without a pain pill, even with this raging headache--I'm gonna try.

Wednesday, November 19, 2008

Cousin Bruno

This afternoon, my cousin Emma emailed me these photos, taken of her son Bruno on Halloween.

At the risk of busting your stitches... she wrote.

Thanks a lot Em--I'm expecting you to drive me to the doctor tomorrow, first thing!

xoxo

I am a best selling author

Dream girl me, oh yeah, right.

So it's not much, but the book "Six-Word Memoirs by Writers Famous & Obscure" is a New York Times best seller, and you've got to admit, it looks cool on a resumé.

I am honored to be published alongside Joyce Carol Oats, Deepak Chopra and Joan Rivers--and especially Tai Moses, my friend of 35 years.

Click here for editorial reviews and more.

In real time

Ouch.
Can't sleep.
Ouch.
Perc won't work.
Ouch.
Wish my Mom was up.
Ouch.

Tuesday, November 18, 2008

For 94 minutes...

Visit this film.

Five stars without painkillers.

Letter to the prez


(Here you go, Tai)


Dear President-Elect Obama,

My name is Annie Kosh. I’m eleven years old and attend 6th grade at P.S. 187 Hudson Cliffs School in New York City. One of my concerns is about animals in shelters. I have a puppy, and I can’t imagine her living her life like those poor animals. I would never want her to be cooped up in a cage all day, not always having clean and fresh food and water, and always being in danger of being put down or dying of sickness or starvation. Shelters like the ASPCA are trying to fix things like that, but I know that you as president would have an even bigger impact on America. You could do things like make sure the animals are never in danger of being put down, unless they are sick and in pain, and the right thing to do is put them down. You could make sure all the animals, not just dogs, will have clean food and water, be able to interact with other animals, not be cooped up in a small cage all the time, and that they are kept safe and healthy until they find a home. Now that you and your family are getting a dog, you will grow to love it and will understand more about how much animals matter to everyone, and that they deserve to be treated well and taken care of.

Thank you so much for taking time to read my concerns.

Sincerely,

Annie Kosh

Monday, November 17, 2008

On your mark, get Percocet...

Go!

Goodnight!

Recovery day 5

Slept seven hours last night, had toast and eggs then slept 3 more. Frank brought coffee, I watched movies, Annie read her letter to Obama, and Tai sent me this ceramic Leo with a little flat tummy.

Command central

Sweetie, honey, sugar, dear

If you want more, then please click here.

Sound

I used to be irritated by the flute playing in the next building--but somehow, now, mixed in with the screeching sounds of moving trucks and rain falling, I find it beautiful and soothing.

Either the musician has improved or I have, for some reason, become more tolerant.

Covered

Weaning off the Percs--what a comfort to have backup.

Fact #88,932

I love watermelon.

Lucky me

The other day I picked up the phone, and on the other end of the line my mother asked, "Is this the daughter of my dreams?"

Had to

Sunday, November 16, 2008

Popped a perc

Lulu made dinner and brought me a plate, Annie took out the trash and made me laugh. Chloé washed my hair in the kitchen sink, and I got a call from someone I love.

It was a big day.

Goodnight.

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